This is part 7 of a 10 part parenting series, you can read the previous post Top 10 things you can do for yourself to be a better parent. #6 Have Passion! by clicking here.

#7 Heal The Past.

I have to say, this is the biggest and most difficult thing preventing me from being as close as I can with my son. Sometimes I feel shrouded and taken over by the past. And in those moments, I’m not in the present, and I’m definitely not the best parent I can be.
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Last year, I had the pleasure of interviewing Dr. Peter Haiman.  Aside from being and authentic and good hearted individual, he is also a wealth of parenting knowledge.  You can visit his website at PeterHaiman.com for more info.

I will be posting the audio interview here soon.

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This is part 4 of a 5 part series, to see the previous post T.V. Shows for Your Toddler, The 5 Best Age Appropriate, #3 Sesame Street click here.

(These shows are not listed in a particular order).

#4 Barney And Friends

Barney is a controversial figure in children’s television. Either parents love him, or they don’t.  Some parents find his upbeat and positive attitude irritating.
Personally, I’m a huge fan of Barney.  I see his happiness and joy as something the world could use more of. Barney is positive, kind, generous and never says a mean thing.

If more people were like Barney, the world would be a better place, and everyone would be much more kind and loving to one another.
Parent’s main concern over Barney’s positivity, is that by watching Barney their child will somehow be put in an unrealistic positive bubble.  Don’t worry parents, have no fear, as that’s not likely to happen.  One hour a day or a week of Barney is not enough to influence your child into a comatose positive state.

Research shows that children need positive re-enforcement early on, as later, when they venture out into the world it helps them meet any challenge that comes up. Introducing little ones to stresses of life and cynicism early on only promotes low self esteem and fear.

Interesting Barney Trivia:

• Did you know that Barneys full name is Barney T. DINOSAUR.
• Did you know that Barney’s favorite bread is pumpernickel.
• Did you know that Barney and friends has been on the air since 1992.
  Studies conducted at Yale show that Barney and Friends is very educational for pre-schoolers.
  

Please Check out Wikipedia for more interesting facts about Barney and Friends on Wikipedia.

This is part 3 of a 5 part series, to see the previous post T.V. Shows for Your Toddler, The 5 Best Age Appropriate, #2 Go Diego Go! click here.

(These shows are not listed in a particular order.)

#3 Sesame Street

Hi Parents!

I mean, who doesn’t love Sesame Street!?!
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This is part 2 of a 5 part series, to see the previous post T.V. Shows for Your Toddler, The 5 Best Age Appropriate, #1 Dora the Explorer click here.

(These shows are not listed in a particular order).

#2 Go Diego Go!

Since Dora and Diego go hand in hand, the reasons I like both are the same, please see the previous Dora post to find out about what your child can learn.

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This is part 1 of a 5 part series, to see the previous post Top 5 Best Age Appropriate T.V. Shows for Your Toddler, Your little ones don’t wanna miss these…click here. (The shows are not listed in a particular order).

#1 Dora The Explorer

What I like about Dora is she’s positive and uplifting, reinforcing and self esteem building. There’s not a lot of drama besides Swiper swiping the occasional goody.  Another positive is the graphics are presented at a slower pace.  Not so much crazy overstimulation happening.  Swiper is the only thing I have mixed feelings about, as he steals.  But it seems to be in good fun…

What your child may learn from Dora the Explorer:

* Spanish Vocabulary
* Positive attitude towards life
* Perseverance and empathy
* Acceptance and tolerance of different races and ethnicities
* Math and music skills as well as physical coordination
* How to observe situations and solve problems

This is what’s said about Dora on her stations website (an excerpt from an interview with the show’s creators):

What will Dora the Explorer teach my child?
Dora the Explorer teaches children basic Spanish words and phrases along with math and music skills and physical coordination. Children also learn with Dora how to observe situations and solve problems.

How does Dora the Explorer teach Spanish?
In each episode of Dora the Explorer, Dora solves a problem based on specific words and phrases in conversational Spanish, which preschoolers learn as they solve the problem with her. These words and phrases include a variety of basic nouns, adjectives, and commands, such as “azul” for “blue”, and “cuidado”, which means “watch out”.

What makes Dora the Explorer different from other children’s programs?
A. Val: One of the things I love most about the show, and something that makes it unique, is that viewers are asked to be active participants - not only by answering questions, but by getting off the couch and moving their bodies. Parents tell us they know when Dora is on because they’ll see and hear their kids playing along with the show: counting, speaking Spanish, jumping, rowing, clapping, etc.

Can you talk about the interactivity of the show?
A. Chris: It’s probably the most important aspect of the show and the thing that kids enjoy most. Parents can always tell when their kids are watching Dora by hearing the kids talking back to the screen. We are also extremely proud of how successful we have been in getting kids off the sofa, up, and moving.

How do you make sure the shows are appropriate for the audience?
A. Eric: I used to write for preschool shows (such as Gullah Gullah Island) before I had preschoolers of my own. Now I have a 6-year-old son, a 4-year-old daughter, and 4-month-old son, and along with being an incredible experience, being a parent has been helpful as I try to write stories that are appropriate for our audience. It’s like having my very own focus group. I tell my kids the stories we’re working on as bedtime stories to see how they react (though I’ve discovered that Dora stories, being interactive, work better on car trips than when I want my kids to calm down and get sleepy). I try out story ideas on them to see if they’re hooked by the premise. In fact, I’ve asked my eldest son for help in my writing so many times that now he often says, “Not right now, I’m on a break.”
At the same time, every Dora episode is tested (and re-tested) by our Research Department with large numbers of preschoolers and we learn an incredible amount every time. And sometimes I discover that a story my kids assured me would be thrilling or hysterically funny only works when Daddy is telling it to his own children.

How is Dora a role model?
A. Val: Dora is a problem solver who doesn’t give up when faced with obstacles. She’s a caring friend always ready to stop and help someone in need; and she’s an adventurer whose curiosity and spirit lead her to explore the world. Dora’s a role model not only for children, but for adults, too!

Why is Spanish used in the show?
A. Val: Educators believe that introducing a second language to a child before the age of 6 or 7 is an important factor in his/her ability to achieve fluency. For many of our preschool viewers, Dora is their first encounter with a foreign language. As such, the show might teach them a little Spanish and make them curious and interested in learning more, or simply make them aware of and comfortable with foreign languages. For our Spanish-speaking preschool viewers, seeing Dora use Spanish might encourage them to take pride in being bilingual.

Dora episodes always follow a similar theme:

Dora needs to do something or go somewhere.
Dora has three or four places to go, with a final destination.
Dora and Boots meet Swiper along the way and sometime succeed to stop swiper from swiping by saying ‘Swiper no Swiping’ three times.
Though sometimes Swiper successfully swipes Dora’s items and hides them.
Dora and Boots always find the hidden item.
Dora will meet one of her friends at each of the locations on the Map.
Dora will ask the viewers to help her by giving advice (jump, run etc.), locating items and often shouting commands to the characters in Spanish.
Every character that appears on the episode then sings ‘We did it’ at the end except for Swiper.
Dora asks viewers what their favorite part was. She (and usually Boots) then proceeds to tell the viewer which part of the adventure she most enjoyed.

Interesting Dora the Explorer Trivia:

Did you know that Dora and Boots are best friends because she saved his beloved red boots from being swiped by Swiper.
Did you know that Dora’s main musical skill lies in the wooden flute.
Did you know that given the right reason Swiper (the sneaky fox) will always return things he swiped as a good gesture.
Did you know that Swiper has a New York accent.
Did you know that Swiper doesn’t speak Spanish but wished he did.
Isa the iguana has a crush on boots and knew him long before she met Dora.

… And best of all they’re GUILT FREE!!!

After spending many hours searching for age appropriate T.V. shows, I’ve narrowed it down to five excellent shows. These shows not only entertain but NURTURE and promote positive, healthy development in your toddler.

Though I have to confess, my rating system is picky and most shows don’t make it through my screening.
I’d rather err on the side of caution than expose my toddler to concepts that are inappropriate.

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This is part 6 of a 10 part parenting series, you can read the previous post : Top 10 things you can do for yourself to be a better parent #5 Spend Time Alone, by clicking here.

Everyone deserves to have a passion for something!  Whether its a hobby or career, there needs to be some degree of passion in your life.  Many, many people go through life with zero passion, and it shows.  But you don’t have to be one of those people.  The art of finding ones passion isn’t always easy, and its a numbers game.  So try a few different things and you’ll know when you hit on something you love.  When you do find something you love keep doing it!!!

Having a passion will automatically transfer to your home and family life.  It will seep into every cranny and nook, making things more magical and beautiful than ever before!

I know as a mom its often difficult to find the time to do the things you love.  But this one is a MUST if you want to live a fulfilled life.  And parents beware: don’t feel guilty if your family isn’t your sole passion.  They don’t have to be, moms and dads can have many, many passions.

What’s yours?

If you need help finding your passion, I would recommend reading The Passion Test or visiting Inspiration Point, finding your passion and doing any of the programs available.

Good luck!

Ashley

This is part 5 of a 10 part parenting series, you can read the previous post : Top 10 things you can do for yourself to be a better parent. #4 Talk to a friend

At least once a week you need to have time to spend a few uninterrupted  hours by yourself.  To read, take a bath, whatever.  As a parent, you need AND deserve this time.  So ask your partner, family member or hire a babysitter.  To locate a babysitter in your area online try one of these: Kijiji, Craigslilst, Care babysitting finder.  Or just Google “babysitting and nanny service.”

After spending a few hours by yourself you’ll feel refreshed and restored; better able to be a GREAT parent.  Don’t take my word for it, try it for yourself.

This is part 4 of a 10 part parenting series, you can read the previous post : Top 10 things you can do for yourself to be a better parent. #4 Talk to a friend, here.

Parent Series: Top 10 things you can do for yourself to be a better parent. #4 Talk to a friend….

Its critical to have someone to talk to about your feelings and parental stresses.

Research shows that parents that release emotion regularly have significantly less stress than parents that don’t.  A way that you can do this is by trading “listening time” with a trusted friend.  Otherwise known as “co-councelling,”

This is a free and effective way to offload intense feelings that arise from being a parent.  You can find out more about this on the re-evaluation councelling website.

Re-evaluation Counseling (co-councelling) is a process whereby people of all ages and of all backgrounds can learn how to exchange effective help with each other in order to free themselves from the effects of past distress experiences.

Re-evaluation Counseling theory provides a model of what a human being can be like in the area of his/her interaction with other human beings and his/her environment. The theory assumes that everyone is born with tremendous intellectual potential, natural zest, and lovingness, but that these qualities have become blocked and obscured in adults as the result of accumulated distress experiences (fear, hurt, loss, pain, anger, embarrassment, etc.) which begin early in our lives.

When adequate emotional discharge can take place, the person is freed from the rigid pattern of behavior and feeling left by the hurt. The basic loving, cooperative, intelligent, and zestful nature is then free to operate. Such a person will tend to be more effective in looking out for his or her own interests and the interests of others, and will be more capable of acting successfully against injustice.

The biggest difference in my own parenting comes from having my feelings listened to.  If I had to choose 1 out of the 10 things to be a better parent, this one would be it.

Its important when you trade time with another friend or parent that you just listen to each other, you don’t interject.  There needs to be room for feelings and crying, to discharge the intensity of the heavy demands of parenting.  So find a friend or fellow parent that’s comfortable with crying.  If you have any questions about this process email me or check out the websites above.

Talk to you soon!

Ashley